Implications of Frustration
Frustration is an accumulation of unmet expectations.
It’s always worse when it keeps happening, the sixth time apparently more draining than the first. The emotional imprint of past shortcomings (even indirectly related failures) resurface to feed the boiling point. It could be something that happened just moments ago or over the course of many years. Recycling these images and feelings compounds.
Clarifying this distinction helps navigate through the feeling. I wouldn’t be frustrated in the first place if I didn’t care for a goal or intent. If I truly want something — to bring an idea, expectation, a result into reality — I must align the necessary components. Frustration makes it difficult to see these aspects and assess cause and effect. This frantic outburst may have some utility in going beyond the routine that maintains a loop, often inciting decisive action, but nevertheless, it is unrefined and unfocused.
Is the outcome more important than the feeling?
I should act according to this question’s answer. In true desire of realizing my goal, I must balance frustration with focus. This is the difference between spurring someone on with backhanded comments or effectively communicating insight amidst a heated argument. The choice between admitting defeat and setting it all ablaze or expanding my attempt to find alternative solutions.
Of course, by the nature of frustration, the idea of backing out of it doesn’t always occur or flits away as swiftly as it appeared. Like most opportunities, the decision to reconsider must be acted upon promptly. When I do notice the choice, I make space to recognize all the past moments welling up to feed frustration. They are not now. By lucidly holding these moments, I may likewise release them.
As I release my sight and judgement of past shortfalls, I soothe frustration, enabling a more pure focus of present choices — the available possibilities more aligned with my desire.
Most often, I experience a more subtle form of frustration where I am quietly overwhelmed when trying to figure something out such as musical creation, writing, winning a game, organization… and I just cast it aside and focus on something else.
It can be healthy to switch focus when a contemplation grows stagnant or detrimental, but doing so at the wrong time can mean severing momentum. When I settle that feeling and let my thoughts consider practical ways forward, I may retain or even spark momentum.
